Some lies are whispered so often they begin to sound like the truth. One of the most subtle, destructive lies Christians often hear is this: Jesus is gracious, but God the Father is short-tempered and hot-headed.
Sometimes we picture Jesus as the gentle Saviour who steps in to shield us from the temper of a disappointed and distant Father. In this view, Jesus loves us, but the Father tolerates us because Jesus asked him to.
But this is a departure from the gospel.
Jesus said, “In that day you will ask in my name. I am not saying that I will ask the Father on your behalf. No, the Father himself loves you because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God” (John 16:27).
The gospel is not about Jesus twisting the Father’s arm into mercy. It is the radiant, unstoppable movement of divine love flowing from the heart of the Triune God. The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit act in perfect unity to rescue, redeem, and restore us.
Doubting the Father’s Love
This lie goes all the way back to Eden. After Adam and Eve sinned, they hid from God—not because God had changed. They hid because shame distorted how they saw him. And the adversary uses shame to perpetuate the same lie today: “God doesn’t want you near. He’s disappointed in you.”
The human heart is prone to project its wounds, fears, and earthly experiences of fathers onto God. If we knew authority figures who were harsh or emotionally distant, we could easily assume God the Father is like that, too. Then Jesus becomes the kind friend who sneaks us in through the back door while the Father reluctantly lets us stay.
But Jesus did not come to the world against the Father’s will. It was the Father who sent him.
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son” (John 3:16).
The Father does not love us because of the cross. The cross happened because the Father loves us.
No Conflict in Heaven
The gospel does not assume inter-Trinitarian conflict. The Father, Son, and Spirit are never at odds. There is no “good cop, bad cop” in the Trinity. The Son did not throw himself in front of the Father’s wrath to change his mind. Instead, Jesus came to reveal the Father’s heart.
“Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father.” (John 14:9)
Jesus is not more loving than the Father. He is the exact representation of the Father’s being (Heb. 1:3). Everything you love about Jesus—his compassion, gentleness, and fierce pursuit of the broken— is the Father’s own nature.
If Jesus forgives, heals, and welcomes sinners, it is because the Father delights to do so. The gospel is not Jesus vs. the Father. It is Jesus with the Father, and from the Father.
When the Lie Lingers in Our Hearts
Even mature believers sometimes fall into the trap of viewing the Father as distant or displeased. When we sin, we instinctively run to Jesus but shrink back from the Father. We may find it easier to picture Jesus embracing us than to imagine the Father running down the road, as in the story of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32).
But it was the father who ran. He put the ring on the son’s finger, the robe on his back, and put the feast on the table.
Jesus told the parable—not to reveal what he is like—but to show us what his Father is like.
When you pray, you are not talking to a reluctant judge whose arm was twisted into mercy. You are talking to the one who so loved you that he gave his Son, who sent his Spirit into your heart, crying, “Abba! Father!” (Rom. 8:15).
Healing our View of the Father’s Love
Many of us need our hearts rewired and our theology fine-tuned to see the Father truly. This happens with theological reasoning, the truth of the Word and the personal work of the Holy Spirit in our hearts.
If you’ve struggled to approach God the Father, here are some anchoring truths to hold onto:
- Jesus came in obedience to the Father’s sending. The cross was his idea. (Gal. 4:4–6)
- Adoption is the Father’s delight (Eph. 1:5)
- You were not saved to remain a slave to fear. You are a child of God. The Spirit invites you to cry, “Abba Father” (Rom. 8:15, 1 John 3:1).
- The Father chose you and planned your redemption in Christ (Eph. 1:3-10)
- The work of Christ brings us into union with the Father (John 14:6).
- The Father rejoices over you (Zeph. 3:17)
The work of Christ reveals the heart of the Father. You do not need to flinch when you think of God. You do not need to wonder if he is disappointed or distant. Jesus is not your refuge from the Father. He is your way to the Father.
So come boldly, come as you are, and come with confidence because “the Father himself loves you” (John 16:27).
